Fighting this beast like a warrior

Fighting this beast like a warrior

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Cleaning Things Out Without Thoughts of Dying

Yes, I felt the need to spring clean today. I raked up some of the front yard before pooping out. I have to work on my stamina, because I literally could only do half and many of you know how tiny the front yard is. It was gratifying to see the irises, oregano, thyme and lavender all coming back with vigor. I found the crab apple tree I planted when B was born has a split in the trunk. I think it's from being in the path of the plow. We'll just have to see if it survives. If not, I will plant a plum, I think.

To recover from the gardening, I played iPaddy with B and tried not to be a slug. It was hard today because I really did not sleep well last night and we lost an hour and I wish I could just get eight solid hours of sleep. A woman can dream. Pat took B to swimming and I decided it was time to clean out my dresser. I have been wanting to get rid of stuff in my dresser, but was too afraid that it would mark some sort of ritual around dying. You know, people start giving stuff away, throwing crap out so their kids or spouse don't have to deal with it. But, really, for me today was about getting the shirts and giant undies out and making room for the stuff that has been living on top of my dresser for the past year. I thought I would feel more meaning in the things I was tossing (and donating), but when it come right down to it, they are just things.

Why did it take me so long to learn this lesson? And why not give some things away? I have some beautiful things sitting in boxes, why not get them into the hands of people who will appreciate them? I have no need for these things. And not because I have cancer, but because I got a little common sense today.

1 comment:

  1. I love, love, love this post. There is a silent earth tremor in it, and irises, oregano, thyme and lavender are coming up out of the tiny cracks of your common sense, and strength.

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