A Little Good News

So I went to chemo today and before my treatment I had a appointment with Dr B. He was very serious and talked again about the clinical trials, hooking up with an oncologist in Boston, etc. I am open to all that. Then he palpitated my abdomen and told me the main tumor there was smaller and softer. Both signs that the new drugs are working. Yay. He also told me he felt comfortable putting off the CT scan for another 2 cycles - so that is 6 cycles instead of 4. That's also good news. Pat says his mood changed after the palpitation, I didn't notice because I was so relieved.

I also asked if I can fly with the embolism in my lung. He said yes. It's not a blood clot, but a piece of a tumor. That is so gross, I don't even want to know. That means I get to go to St Lucia in February. Thank goodness. I am looking so forward to a week in a villa with Pat, Bennett, Mary and Anna.

It's funny I didn't know how worried I was. I know now because I am so relieved. And Pat too. We were a little testy with each other last night and even a little this morning. On the way home from Worcester, we talked about how stressed out we were. Even though I know that even if this drug stops working, I won't fall down dead from the news, I still don't want to die. Steve Jobs said that even people who want to get to heaven don't want to die. I can totally relate. Speaking of Steve Jobs, this is going to sound weird but his death, while very sad, is comforting to me. I think it's because if he can do it, I can too. I don't know why I feel this way, but I do.

So that's the news. I feel headachy and Dr B. said that this cycle shouldn't be as hard as last time, because last time I was getting this terrible virus. And it lingers on even after a round of antibiotics. At least the infection is gone, now I have to get rid of the cough.

I have to give you all a big thank you for your prayers and good thoughts and wishes. I couldn't do it without you all.