Kitty Appears to be Fine

As suspected, Kitty looked much better today and seems pretty fine. She has a cut on her head that I've bravely cleaned out twice and now the goose-egg is gone. She is a tough nut, so she will be fine. Her infirmity reminds me of how fond of her I am. Honestly, most days I just ignore her, but she is a good kitty and I love her.

Another good day. A day filled with good activity and some worry. I am already starting to worry about chemo on Tuesday. Liz is going to take me, so that's all set and comforting. I think I am worried about how bad I am going to feel after treatment. I don't want to spend a lot of time horizontal again. I know it's part of the gig, but I am feeling so much better. I also know that I am feeling better because they reduced my dose again, so I am better able to tolerate it. I am very curious if they are going to give me the same dose, increase my dose and give me Nuelasta, or what? Some other possibility that I haven't thought of. Those oncologists like to keep me on my feet - or should I say off me feet...

Today I started off the day by accidentally taking too much anti-anxiety medication and I had to take a nap at 10am. Luckily Pat and Bennett were off on an adventure and my job was to stay home and rest anyway. I took it literally.  After that I did the laundry, worked for about an hour in the studio, took B to aunties' house and did a very minimal garden clean up. I worked in the garden with latex gloves and a surgical mask. I am not taking any chances. I just wanted to be able to pull into the drive without be accosted by drooping plants. I will do a full clean up in the spring and hope for the best. I try really hard not to leave anything to moulder in my tiny yard. Perhaps this is the year that my plants will learn to toughen up - be Holyoke plants.

I am exhausted to the bone. All this feeling good and doing stuff is tiring. I don't want to pretend that I am not having a hard time at all. There are moments that are super hard and I broke down while working in the studio. Poor Pat was working hard on getting the awning we built about five years ago up and I fall apart. There is no way of knowing when I am going to burst into tears these days. Pat says they are just part of the process. She is right and it does feel good to release the tears. It's just such a bummer.

Tomorrow I am going to the 8am service at St Paul's in Holyoke. I will let you know how it goes. I don't know anything about Episcopal churches, though my mom sent me links for information. I looked and they seem to be much more open to the world and I like that. I will let you know how it goes.

That's it for tonight. Goodnight everyone. And a special request to those who are shy about posting comments. Please do. I love them and they give me a real boost during the day when I check to see if there are any comments. I lap up every word - so please stop being shy and comment.